Sparkling events boost wellbeing. In this blog we look at those extraordinary moments in our lives that challenge our status quo and enable us to see things in a different light. We call these sparkling events or unique outcomes. And they play an important role in boosting our mental health and wellbeing.
The great thing about sparkling events is that they reveal personal abilities that exist within our skillset, but which we often ignore or dismiss. As a consequence, when they occur we may not even notice them or realise they are significant.
Sparkling events boost wellbeing
When we face challenges, it is easy to become drawn into negative thinking. We might tell ourselves that bad things always happen to us, that we are a failure or that we will never succeed. These ‘thin’ or limited descriptions of ourselves and our abilities often fit with a wider ‘problem story’ that we tell ourselves. They ignore the complexity of the situations we encounter as well as the skills we possess and leave us little room for movement.
Sparkling events, on the other hand, stand outside and contradict our problem story, illuminating a different way forwards. They may be associated with unique outcomes, ways of acting, thinking or feeling that involve us stepping outside our comfort zone or standing up to our negative or self-critical inner voice.
Noticing sparkling events helps us develop ‘thicker’ alternative stories about ourselves and our abilities that enhance our wellbeing and confidence.
Discovering sparkling events
Try to notice any events, however small, that stand outside your usual description of yourself. These may be ways of acting, thinking or feeling differently that you wouldn’t normally do. It might be a time when you showed courage or perseverance. It might be something big or small.
For example, it might have been when you:
- tried out something new that you were worried about doing
- stood up to your critical inner voice
- surprised yourself by taking actions that were outside your comfort zone
- were able to accept difficult emotions would pass
- resisted the urge to do what your negative thoughts were telling you
- didn’t allow the ‘thin’ description or problem story to stop you from doing something that you wanted to do, or thought was important
Nurturing sparkling events
Sparkling events often go unnoticed. And when we do notice them it can be easy to dismiss them, see them as insignificant or a fluke.
Once you have noticed a sparkling event you need to nurture it.
- Think about what was different in this moment. How did you act or feel differently? What are you most pleased to recall about yourself in this moment? What might others have noticed about you?
- Think about what prompted you to do it? What was your intention and why was it important to you to act on these intentions?
- What did you learn from doing this? Which barriers did you have to overcome? What might help you do so again?
- How does doing things differently in this way fit with your hopes for yourself in your work or life?
- How else has this quality shown itself over the last couple of weeks?
As you notice and nurture sparkling events in the past, present and future, they will help you to see yourself differently. They thicken an alternative, more balanced story about yourself and your abilities and reduce the power that the ‘thin’ description holds over you.
When we do this, we start to feel more confident and capable of dealing with what life throws at us. In this way those sparkling events boost wellbeing and resilience.
If you found this helpful and would like to read more bitesize tips to boost your health and wellbeing at work and at home, check out some of the other blogs in this series. You might also like to join our Facebook group UR Resilient, where members are busy sharing creative and inspiring ideas to build personal resilience and maintain a positive mindset during this challenging time.